I miss you more than I can bare

    It's so hard when all you can do is to think, stare and wait...

It's been ten months since I've met this guy (in person). it's been so long, yeah? and still, I am waiting for the day to see his smile again, it was like a goddamn marathon of my life without him, can you imagine? I used to be with him before and all of a sudden we're apart? I can't do anything with it, I choose to be in this situation and I have no choice but to deal with it.

I know it is hard to be in this kind of relationship, LDR? oh c'mon, do you think we'll survive? we are million miles away from each other and even if I stretch my hands so hard, still I will not reach his hands again..


Many people are rid of it, thanks to modern technology! Yes, Internet helps more than the telephone. In this age, we are glad there are Skye, MSN messenger and every single chat function on Facebook, Gmail and Yahoo. We, the survivors of LDR, are grateful for the existence of Internet! but is that enough to show your affection?


Well, if you are deeply attach to someone, it is much easier to deal with this kind of relationship we should have trust and willing to take risks wholeheartedly in order to continue the journey, so easy to say huh? but can we really do it for real? REALLY?FOR REAL?


I admit, I almost cried and think deeply every single night or day and yeah, even though I'm trying to take him out of my mind still memories flashes back and  I cant' help it.


"What" and "if" simple words but very powerful in terms of thinking and concluding..... this made me almost crazy!!!! what if he quits? what if i quits? what if we both quit? as a matter of fact, I tried quitting but every time I'm trying or doing it so, it's not working or happening it was like there's no reason, he keeps me holding on like handling a firm grip from his hands and I really can't let go, I just can't.

I can still remember the days and it was like repeating over and over again.....
how I wish I have super powers that is capable  to be with him always but it's sad to say that I can't, it can't be.


So I'm here typing this and starring at my computer thinking about....hhhhmmmm.... stuff and whatever~ still waiting and waiting...........

                                                                    I miss you....